**Before I begin let me digress. Am I the only one that reads others blogs and gets inspired? I don't get inspired in the traditional sense of the word. Instead I simply begin to see the things that where always there to be said. The things I write here are my life lessons, the things I've done, seen, heard and learned from (or simple revelation from the Great Unknowable lived out in day to day life). Sometimes its easy to trivialize these things, and I think as we go through life we don't "forget" these things much in the same way you never "forget" how to ride your bike, although I do think we consciously forget, and I tend to do that.
I think our life lessons work the way the Great Divines word is written on our hearts, I think it works more like muscle memory. Muscle memory is the idea that once you've done something enough times it becomes ingrained in your brain and becomes associated with that particular movement and sometimes specific equipment, so the idea is once your muscles start doing the movements again you find that even though you can't specifically recall how to do those things your muscles are naturally inclined to do them. So for example a basketball team runs a certain play lots and lots of times so that they will remember how to run it without even having to think about it.
I think this is true for our life lessons and the Great Divines word, it becomes ingrained in us and associated with certain situations so that when we face adversity we find ourselves making certain decisions without hesitation, I guess conscience is really the word for it but I feel the word doesn't convey the whole thought. I think others blogs work to bring out those life lessons to the forefront, for me at least. Wow, I really digressed pretty far, ON WITH THE SHOW!**
"Comparison breeds contempt.", another personal mantra of mine. The Great Divine told me this once, and it took me days before I realized how true this was and exactly how far the rabbit hole went with this one. The first time you hear those words you kind of listen to it the way you listen to music, you simply listen to the words but don't really pay attention to what the song is saying. I think its because there are SO many sayings like this and after a while they all muddle together and we build up an immunity to them. Once you start to really analyze whats being said though and apply it to your own life you start to realize how true this is. At first I thought it was only a one way thing, sort of a "you shouldn't consider yourself better than others" thing, then I realized it goes both ways. No matter what the outcome of the comparison it always ends in contempt. "That person makes more money, has a better car, looks better than me etc etc etc." Once you start thinking that, it doesn't take long for contempt to settle in. At first thats as far as I took it and I put forth the effort to apply the principal to my life.
Then the Great Divine took it deeper, showing me that I should be careful not to compare my SPIRITUALITY against others as it also leads to contempt. The concept is a hard one to follow, as we live in a society that requires empirical evidence as well as a way to measure their success against yours aka the zero's on your paycheck, the kind of car you drive, and the list goes on. Because of that we can find ourselves trying to find an empirical way to measure our spirituality against others and we can find ourselves hating others at church and having a hard time figuring out why. Then we find ourselves disillusioned and hating church and the people who go there. Its hard for me to keep myself from comparing myself against others as I'm a very empirical sort of person. I like to have something to compare against and its easy for me to fall into the trap of comparing myself with others. The Unknowable has called us to love one another, and in his world there is no first place. Try as we might we can't earn what he gives us and we certainly aren't deserving of it either. Its interesting when you realize how deep seeded comparison is in your life and how it affects how you view others. I just hope I can live a life without comparison and not fall into the rabbit hole that leads to contempt and hatred in my life.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Commence Digestion
I have a few fetishes one of which is the sight and sound of raw talent. So lately I've been watching "The Black Cab Sessions" an idea which when I first heard of it literally "floored" me. Basically its a group of people in the U.K. who take recording equipment, meet a band in the middle of London, hail one of the cities obligatory black cabbies and ride around filming the band playing a song. Its a one take kinda thing. I've pretty much watched them all so far (I did skip around a bit and I can't say I've really seen them all) and without sounding too much like a gamer I will say that it is indeed "epic" (or "purple" for those in the know). I think the whole "back seat of a cab" venue has its own sort of ambiance that you can't really get anywhere else, and its nicely portrayed in the videos. http://www.blackcabsessions.com/ here is the link if your interested in listening to some good stuff, its nice to see that they are taking both local U.K. bands as well as some American bands. I prefer listening to the new talent like Eugene Mcguiness or Luke Toms who dresses like Galager but sounds amazing in my book, but I think its nice to hear more well known bands like The Kooks and The New Pornographers in that sort of a setting as well. On top of this there is this video "http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C_Vtr8i87Do" which is awesome, no you can't hear what hes saying in the beginning but you can hear the song which is the important part. I'm fascinated by peoples ability to set music to words. Generally speaking words are not the problem for me its the music that I have hard time meshing with what I want to say.
The other fetish I have is this weird fascination with online communities, or maybe a better description would be "the power of communities to create things that companies couldn't have thought of in their wildest dreams". A fine example of this is the game Counter Strike, which is in fact a MOD for another popular game Half Life. A MOD in essence is a game built upon someone else's code. You essentially take the code and rework it to make it do what you want. Then add original content you made, models for the characters in game, skins, new sounds, make your own maps and then voila. With every mod you generally release it and it either bombs and no one plays it or you get a small following of people who play it. With Counter Strike it did so well that Valve (the company who made Half Life) acquired the rights to it and began shipping it as a completely separate game. I believe the people who worked on it are now working within the gaming industry as well. Well apparently something like this has been done with a flight simulator and upon hearing this I was intrigued. Apparently there is a community of people who go online everyday and fly planes NOT ONLY do they fly planes there are also a select group within the community who act as air traffic controllers, not only that, the entire system is set up exactly like real life. So you can't just jump in the game and take off. You need to check the weather, make sure your flight plan is worked out and THEN send it in to get clearance so you can even take off and leave the run way. Apparently you can't even BECOME an air traffic controller without having first taken the test to get your license to actually do the job in game. The way it all works is through a network set up that allows you to talk to the air traffic controllers in the game, a program called "sqwakbox(sp?)". But the whole thing is player run, so the servers are set up and maintained by someone somewhere and of course the program is all coded and distributed freely. Personally I thought it was the coolest thing ever, I love peoples imagination and companies willingness to let people mess around with their code always allows for nice surprises. Which is why I love any game with a map editor. I've tried my hand at mapping and modding for several games but my inability to follow through with projects always bites me in the arse. So I'm left with little to show for it. Which is why most of the ideas I have are shelved.
This is an odd sort of post, no deep philosophical or religious things to talk about no insights or revelations really. I was challenged that I hadn't written anything in a while however so I figured I would remedy that situation. I'm still on the look out for a job so if you know anyone hiring thats paying 10 bucks an hour or more is flexible around school schedules and can give me close if not full time let me know.
The other fetish I have is this weird fascination with online communities, or maybe a better description would be "the power of communities to create things that companies couldn't have thought of in their wildest dreams". A fine example of this is the game Counter Strike, which is in fact a MOD for another popular game Half Life. A MOD in essence is a game built upon someone else's code. You essentially take the code and rework it to make it do what you want. Then add original content you made, models for the characters in game, skins, new sounds, make your own maps and then voila. With every mod you generally release it and it either bombs and no one plays it or you get a small following of people who play it. With Counter Strike it did so well that Valve (the company who made Half Life) acquired the rights to it and began shipping it as a completely separate game. I believe the people who worked on it are now working within the gaming industry as well. Well apparently something like this has been done with a flight simulator and upon hearing this I was intrigued. Apparently there is a community of people who go online everyday and fly planes NOT ONLY do they fly planes there are also a select group within the community who act as air traffic controllers, not only that, the entire system is set up exactly like real life. So you can't just jump in the game and take off. You need to check the weather, make sure your flight plan is worked out and THEN send it in to get clearance so you can even take off and leave the run way. Apparently you can't even BECOME an air traffic controller without having first taken the test to get your license to actually do the job in game. The way it all works is through a network set up that allows you to talk to the air traffic controllers in the game, a program called "sqwakbox(sp?)". But the whole thing is player run, so the servers are set up and maintained by someone somewhere and of course the program is all coded and distributed freely. Personally I thought it was the coolest thing ever, I love peoples imagination and companies willingness to let people mess around with their code always allows for nice surprises. Which is why I love any game with a map editor. I've tried my hand at mapping and modding for several games but my inability to follow through with projects always bites me in the arse. So I'm left with little to show for it. Which is why most of the ideas I have are shelved.
This is an odd sort of post, no deep philosophical or religious things to talk about no insights or revelations really. I was challenged that I hadn't written anything in a while however so I figured I would remedy that situation. I'm still on the look out for a job so if you know anyone hiring thats paying 10 bucks an hour or more is flexible around school schedules and can give me close if not full time let me know.
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Showing Up
So yesterday before bed I was laying there talking with the J-Man and I was doing what I usually do: breaking down all of my requests into concise form. Its a nice habit I think, it helps me more than it helps the J-Man obviously considering he knows what I'm going to ask before I ask it. However it allows me to understand myself alot better, rather than simply understanding that I want something I have a greater understanding of the reasons I want that something to begin with.
The first thing that struck me was that none of my requests mattered, that in fact I had asked for all of those things multiple times and the J-Man had not misplaced them or forgotten about them (another lesson in understanding that he works on his own timetable, not on mine). More to the point I wondered what I should be asking him and the words "What do you want me to do?" came out (before that I had thought about saying "What do you need me to do?" but realized that he doesn't "need" anything from me). I had asked that quite a few times before, this certainly wasn't the first or the last time. But for some reason they seemed to hold more value this time around, I guess its like telling someone you love them simply out of habit and telling someone you love them just before one of you dies. The telling comes from some deep seated part of you and it conveys so much more through the words. It felt like this time I had really meant it, had really wanted to know this time around. He of course obliged, not simply answering me with words but in an odd sort of way (which for him is pretty normal).
I began to wonder what it would be like if he was a physical being, if our relationship was built on physical pretenses. I imagined calling up my friends to play some poker and calling up the J-Man to join us, or playing Catan with Shadraq and the J-Man and whoever else we could get a hold of. Then I made the connection, even though I find that my relationship with him has so far diverged from what anyone would call "normal" I still put religious constraints on it. I'm still using a religious measure to try to figure out if our relationship is "good"or if we are "moving forward". I think its a realization that in the end he asked us to love him. He never asked us to "make it work" he didn't ask us to "grow up" or keep some sort of tab on our relationship so he would know were we where. Seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened, the only thing required of us in those statements is that we show up. He wants us to call him up, to set aside time for him. Time and effort on our part is all hes looking for, which is weird to think about. I imagine that in heaven the only record keeping that he does as far as measuring his success with us is keeping a record of the time we commit to him, and I'm not talking about the religious type of commitment where you spend 4 hours in intercession. I mean just sitting there thinking about him, or shooting the breeze telling him how your day was.
The first thing that struck me was that none of my requests mattered, that in fact I had asked for all of those things multiple times and the J-Man had not misplaced them or forgotten about them (another lesson in understanding that he works on his own timetable, not on mine). More to the point I wondered what I should be asking him and the words "What do you want me to do?" came out (before that I had thought about saying "What do you need me to do?" but realized that he doesn't "need" anything from me). I had asked that quite a few times before, this certainly wasn't the first or the last time. But for some reason they seemed to hold more value this time around, I guess its like telling someone you love them simply out of habit and telling someone you love them just before one of you dies. The telling comes from some deep seated part of you and it conveys so much more through the words. It felt like this time I had really meant it, had really wanted to know this time around. He of course obliged, not simply answering me with words but in an odd sort of way (which for him is pretty normal).
I began to wonder what it would be like if he was a physical being, if our relationship was built on physical pretenses. I imagined calling up my friends to play some poker and calling up the J-Man to join us, or playing Catan with Shadraq and the J-Man and whoever else we could get a hold of. Then I made the connection, even though I find that my relationship with him has so far diverged from what anyone would call "normal" I still put religious constraints on it. I'm still using a religious measure to try to figure out if our relationship is "good"or if we are "moving forward". I think its a realization that in the end he asked us to love him. He never asked us to "make it work" he didn't ask us to "grow up" or keep some sort of tab on our relationship so he would know were we where. Seek and you shall find, knock and the door shall be opened, the only thing required of us in those statements is that we show up. He wants us to call him up, to set aside time for him. Time and effort on our part is all hes looking for, which is weird to think about. I imagine that in heaven the only record keeping that he does as far as measuring his success with us is keeping a record of the time we commit to him, and I'm not talking about the religious type of commitment where you spend 4 hours in intercession. I mean just sitting there thinking about him, or shooting the breeze telling him how your day was.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Grab Bag
So here it is 2 hours to go before my first day of class of the new school year. I'm sitting in the computer lab bored out of my skull, so I figured I'd write something.
Before you ask I didn't do much for new years, I spent the night playing video games online and drinking beer (in case you where wondering it was Pacifico with lime, thank you Shadraq for showing me some good mexican beer). The new years past me by without me taking much time to really "celebrate" it. No new years resolution, no fireworks, no spending time with people (unless you count the fact that I was playing with a friend of mine over the internet), my parents where in yakima and I was home alone. Now before you go making comments to my parents this is not a "woe is me" post. Some small part of me I guess wishes things could have been different. However the rest of me realizes that whether I spent that night with family or friends or not really has little bearing on anything. I wonder why it is that we put so much stock in certain days, Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Years, Birthdays. We pin them down as "Family Days" as if spending time with people on those specific days somehow makes the time spent together sweeter or something. I think we should learn to value the time spent with others period, instead of only valuing the time that we spend with others on holidays or birthdays. Besides I thoroughly enjoyed drinking beer and playing video games.
But its another year of school and I'm still in the same place I was when I graduated high school, I seem to have little to no direction at the moment. I've commited myself to getting a degree in Biology, less out of any sort of affinity to the idea of working in that field and more because I found that I was good at it and there is considerably less Math involved with that field than there is with Computer Science. I'm trying hard to not live in the past and wonder why I didn't do this, or didn't do that why I didn't plan my life better so that I wouldn't have to be in the position I'm in. Its proving rather difficult to do, I guess I can just get in class study hard and hope that the Great Divine will help me finish up this year. If the classes I need to take fall within the correct quarters I can be done by the end of this year (meaning I would be able to move onto WSU and get out of CBC finally). Its interesting how much school makes me think about the Great Divine, its not as if I don't talk to him all the time. However there is difference between routinely talking to someone and thorougly focusing on someone when you talk to them. I think its the difference between hearing someone and really listening to them. Women must have some sort of sixth sense that allows them to distinguish between these two states, as I have heard many a woman tell someone that they weren't "listening" to them talk. When, from what I can tell, there was no way anyone could have not heard what they were saying. Anyways, I find that school makes me "focus" on Him alot more. I think its because I realize and understand that one of my biggest flaws is in my follow thru. I never really had any to begin with so I really need help where that is concerned. The quarters I did well in where made possible by him not me.
I've got another hour and five minutes to go and I'm really compounding quite a bit of thinking into one post, I haven't written much thanks to the fact that I think the last post was the best thing I've written so far, period. Mostly because of what that revelation means to me. Thats neither here nor there though. I saw a quote somewhere (can't remember where) that said "As I get older I'm trying to listen to people more and stop accusing them of things." I doubt thats the EXACT quote so if you know who said it or what the EXACT quote was by all means correct me, I won't like it but at least it will be right. Anyways, the gist of what he was talking about is still there. It caught my attention and I thought it bore repeating.
Lastly, I got a fortune cookie a few days ago that said, "you will develop a new relationship next month" do you think He speaks through fortune cookies?
Before you ask I didn't do much for new years, I spent the night playing video games online and drinking beer (in case you where wondering it was Pacifico with lime, thank you Shadraq for showing me some good mexican beer). The new years past me by without me taking much time to really "celebrate" it. No new years resolution, no fireworks, no spending time with people (unless you count the fact that I was playing with a friend of mine over the internet), my parents where in yakima and I was home alone. Now before you go making comments to my parents this is not a "woe is me" post. Some small part of me I guess wishes things could have been different. However the rest of me realizes that whether I spent that night with family or friends or not really has little bearing on anything. I wonder why it is that we put so much stock in certain days, Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Years, Birthdays. We pin them down as "Family Days" as if spending time with people on those specific days somehow makes the time spent together sweeter or something. I think we should learn to value the time spent with others period, instead of only valuing the time that we spend with others on holidays or birthdays. Besides I thoroughly enjoyed drinking beer and playing video games.
But its another year of school and I'm still in the same place I was when I graduated high school, I seem to have little to no direction at the moment. I've commited myself to getting a degree in Biology, less out of any sort of affinity to the idea of working in that field and more because I found that I was good at it and there is considerably less Math involved with that field than there is with Computer Science. I'm trying hard to not live in the past and wonder why I didn't do this, or didn't do that why I didn't plan my life better so that I wouldn't have to be in the position I'm in. Its proving rather difficult to do, I guess I can just get in class study hard and hope that the Great Divine will help me finish up this year. If the classes I need to take fall within the correct quarters I can be done by the end of this year (meaning I would be able to move onto WSU and get out of CBC finally). Its interesting how much school makes me think about the Great Divine, its not as if I don't talk to him all the time. However there is difference between routinely talking to someone and thorougly focusing on someone when you talk to them. I think its the difference between hearing someone and really listening to them. Women must have some sort of sixth sense that allows them to distinguish between these two states, as I have heard many a woman tell someone that they weren't "listening" to them talk. When, from what I can tell, there was no way anyone could have not heard what they were saying. Anyways, I find that school makes me "focus" on Him alot more. I think its because I realize and understand that one of my biggest flaws is in my follow thru. I never really had any to begin with so I really need help where that is concerned. The quarters I did well in where made possible by him not me.
I've got another hour and five minutes to go and I'm really compounding quite a bit of thinking into one post, I haven't written much thanks to the fact that I think the last post was the best thing I've written so far, period. Mostly because of what that revelation means to me. Thats neither here nor there though. I saw a quote somewhere (can't remember where) that said "As I get older I'm trying to listen to people more and stop accusing them of things." I doubt thats the EXACT quote so if you know who said it or what the EXACT quote was by all means correct me, I won't like it but at least it will be right. Anyways, the gist of what he was talking about is still there. It caught my attention and I thought it bore repeating.
Lastly, I got a fortune cookie a few days ago that said, "you will develop a new relationship next month" do you think He speaks through fortune cookies?
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Arrakis
I was going to start this post by saying that I don't believe in coincidence. After some thought however I realized that whenever I run across something I tend to first jump and say its simple coincidence and then only later do I entertain the thought that it may be something else.
If you've taken the time to look through the side panel of this blog you already know that I'm reading the Dune series by Frank Herbert. I was considering this today, along with the fact that I live in a desert and the fact that if you asked me my spiritual location I would say that I was in one spiritually as well. Its interesting the way that the Great Divine weaves these things together like that. That I should be in the "desert" in mind body and spirit all at once. Its also interesting that I can be there and not realize it till quite a ways into it. This reminded me of something else that I had learned a few years back.
To truly understand this I'll need to set the scene for you with some background. When I was in my teens I used to attend youth group on a regular basis. Now its important for me to describe things as I saw them. The youth group was pretty big all things considered, however at the time it seemed small and I had a fire in me to see it grow, at the same time I wrestled with the realization that in order to see it grow we would first have to show ourselves as good stewards of what we already had. This was back when I used to get to youth group early to do pre service prayer. Back when I had an overwhelming need to "press in" as they say. At the time all I could see where the shortcomings and failings of those around me. How things where not advancing at the pace that I wanted them to. How I felt the pastor was stifling our spiritual journeys. How the people around me weren't taking things seriously enough, and on and on.
A few years of this and it was revealed that our youth pastor would be heading on to something new, that he was leaving to head up a youth ranch in Georgia. It was bitter sweet. On the one hand I realized how much I loved this man who had been my youth pastor. On the other hand I felt that it was his time to go and move on and that he was being removed to be replaced by someone who would do a better job. After that I moved on from youth group and never found out if the new youth pastor lived up to my expectations.
Fast forward a few years. I'm doing a little soul searching at the time in my house. Just chilling with the Great Divine, and boom out of nowhere he brings up all of this stuff from my past. He shows me that I was like the Israelites brought out of Egypt and into the desert. I was surrounded by the miraculous. My spiritual journey had accelerated through that time I had spent in youth group I had experienced things that I have never quite experienced since. People had been touched and changed forever, but all I could see was that it wasn't fast enough, it wasn't good enough. I realized that all of this had come about because my pastor HAD been faithful HAD been following the Great Divine.
The atmosphere in that youth group was unlike anything I would encounter for quite a while after that. I realized that my pastor hadn't failed me, the people around me hadn't failed me and the Great Divine certainly hadn't. I realized that I had failed myself. Failed to do what I know understand and realize I should have done. That in fact the end never justifies the means where spirituality is concerned. The answer is never as important as the question. The finish line is never as important as the race. The journey is more important than the destination. I was trying to run faster and harder than everyone else. In doing so I missed it, I missed the fact that it was more important that I run at the pace I was set to run at. So that I would keep up with the Great Divine. He wanted me to run with him, not try to get to the finish line.
Fast forward again. I didn't learn that lesson then, but I'm slowly beginning to learn this lesson day by day. I'm being taught how to "embrace the desert". Its an odd subtle shift in awareness, one I don't think I have the words to explain. I think I can only liken it to the Dune series: I'm learning how to wear a still suit, how to read the winds and realize when a storm is coming, how to call and ride a worm, how to see the desert as my friend and teacher. I'm letting the desert burn me, and its not a bad thing now. It all seems so pseudo-masochistic, but I guess willingly allowing yourself to be crucified is too. I don't even know if what I'm saying makes sense. I just know what it feels like to do it, and I know that its right. The way when you first started riding your bike you finally hit upon that balance and coordination between your legs, arms, and the rest of your body. You know your doing it right cause it feels right. I don't even care about whether I get out of it or not anymore, it just is and I've embraced it.
If you've taken the time to look through the side panel of this blog you already know that I'm reading the Dune series by Frank Herbert. I was considering this today, along with the fact that I live in a desert and the fact that if you asked me my spiritual location I would say that I was in one spiritually as well. Its interesting the way that the Great Divine weaves these things together like that. That I should be in the "desert" in mind body and spirit all at once. Its also interesting that I can be there and not realize it till quite a ways into it. This reminded me of something else that I had learned a few years back.
To truly understand this I'll need to set the scene for you with some background. When I was in my teens I used to attend youth group on a regular basis. Now its important for me to describe things as I saw them. The youth group was pretty big all things considered, however at the time it seemed small and I had a fire in me to see it grow, at the same time I wrestled with the realization that in order to see it grow we would first have to show ourselves as good stewards of what we already had. This was back when I used to get to youth group early to do pre service prayer. Back when I had an overwhelming need to "press in" as they say. At the time all I could see where the shortcomings and failings of those around me. How things where not advancing at the pace that I wanted them to. How I felt the pastor was stifling our spiritual journeys. How the people around me weren't taking things seriously enough, and on and on.
A few years of this and it was revealed that our youth pastor would be heading on to something new, that he was leaving to head up a youth ranch in Georgia. It was bitter sweet. On the one hand I realized how much I loved this man who had been my youth pastor. On the other hand I felt that it was his time to go and move on and that he was being removed to be replaced by someone who would do a better job. After that I moved on from youth group and never found out if the new youth pastor lived up to my expectations.
Fast forward a few years. I'm doing a little soul searching at the time in my house. Just chilling with the Great Divine, and boom out of nowhere he brings up all of this stuff from my past. He shows me that I was like the Israelites brought out of Egypt and into the desert. I was surrounded by the miraculous. My spiritual journey had accelerated through that time I had spent in youth group I had experienced things that I have never quite experienced since. People had been touched and changed forever, but all I could see was that it wasn't fast enough, it wasn't good enough. I realized that all of this had come about because my pastor HAD been faithful HAD been following the Great Divine.
The atmosphere in that youth group was unlike anything I would encounter for quite a while after that. I realized that my pastor hadn't failed me, the people around me hadn't failed me and the Great Divine certainly hadn't. I realized that I had failed myself. Failed to do what I know understand and realize I should have done. That in fact the end never justifies the means where spirituality is concerned. The answer is never as important as the question. The finish line is never as important as the race. The journey is more important than the destination. I was trying to run faster and harder than everyone else. In doing so I missed it, I missed the fact that it was more important that I run at the pace I was set to run at. So that I would keep up with the Great Divine. He wanted me to run with him, not try to get to the finish line.
Fast forward again. I didn't learn that lesson then, but I'm slowly beginning to learn this lesson day by day. I'm being taught how to "embrace the desert". Its an odd subtle shift in awareness, one I don't think I have the words to explain. I think I can only liken it to the Dune series: I'm learning how to wear a still suit, how to read the winds and realize when a storm is coming, how to call and ride a worm, how to see the desert as my friend and teacher. I'm letting the desert burn me, and its not a bad thing now. It all seems so pseudo-masochistic, but I guess willingly allowing yourself to be crucified is too. I don't even know if what I'm saying makes sense. I just know what it feels like to do it, and I know that its right. The way when you first started riding your bike you finally hit upon that balance and coordination between your legs, arms, and the rest of your body. You know your doing it right cause it feels right. I don't even care about whether I get out of it or not anymore, it just is and I've embraced it.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Musings from The Golden Compass...
So if you've been seeing any movies lately or you are a movie buff of any level you will undoubtedly know about the new movie thats coming out called The Golden Compass. However you may or may not know about the controversy surrounding it. There is a big to do over the movie. The books that the movie is based on where written, according to the author, to be the parallel of the Narnia books. He says that where as the Narnia books espouse Christianity, which is about as true as saying Dune espouses drug abuse and desert living, his books are pro atheism.
That being said you can understand how "The Church" has decided to boycott the movie. I found this....disquieting. One of the things that I have yet to fully come to terms with is peoples inability to draw lines and stick to them. Its a movie, and the makers of the movie have gone to lengths to take out any sort of religious propaganda. So what are you afraid of, are you scared your kids might read a book? Then make sure they don't read the books its that simple. Besides I've read plenty of books that espoused views that where not held by me, it didn't really change the way I saw things. I just thought "that was a good story". Besides, they're kids. There going to go, watch the movie and enjoy it for what it is, entertainment. On top of that most people go watch the movie simply because they don't want to read the book.
In the end though there is something more deep seeded I feel to this argument. I think most of those parents boycotting the movie would readily agree that they wouldn't take their kids to see any R rated films. Most I think would even say they don't like R rated films because of violence. I also think that you would find that many of those self same parents took their kids to see The Passion, which is a movie about watching Jesus get a beat down then tortured to death. This begs the obvious question, which I hope is the overarching question of this entire post. "Where do you draw the line?" and more importantly "Will you stick by that line?"
I think anyone would readily agree that an easy measure of a man is whether or not he sticks by his word. You won't take your kid to a movie because the author is an atheist? Well you might as well stay home from now on and never watch another movie unless its produced by In Light Broadcasting. Most writers of books and movies are atheists, "*gasp* say it ain't so!" I think you should draw the line and say thus farther and no more and stick by it. If you find that you start making exceptions to the rule then its time to reevaluate the line you drew. Is the line not in the right place, or is it simply your just not strong enough to stand by what you said?
I can think of a story which typifies this. Me and some of my friends where at an Applebees once. My friend was recounting a rather odd story. During the story he made mention of a necklace someone was wearing made out of fake penises. Now he had no trouble saying the word penis. But once it came to the point in the story where he was describing the fact that a certain female person had her genitals pierced he refused to say the word clitoris, or vagina for that matter. It bothered me to no end. Now I'm not one to go around yelling penis and vagina, but lets face it if I'm trying to describe something and it involves me talking about genitalia I'm not shy about naming either organ. The thing that bothered me was that he either draws the line at not saying either word or has no problem saying either word. Same thing with cussing. If you don't like it thats fine whatever, just don't go around saying that "shit" is ok to say but "fuck" is taking it too far. Once me and some friends where playing Guitar Hero and my friend, who's house we were in, said "shit" (for sake of understanding we will say his name was Jeff) . A few minutes later my other friend, lets say his name was Brian, said "fuck". Then Jeff proceeded to get mad at Brian for having said "fuck" in his house. After I recovered from my brain aneurysm, I thought how can you cuss in your house and then get made cause someone else cussed in your house? He said it was because what Brian had said was worse than what he had said. Personally I think if he had said either word in the presence of his mother it would not have gone over well either way.
Someone once said "be cold or be hot but don't be lukewarm", words to live by if you ask me. I'm not saying I'm perfect where this is concerned but I'm trying. I can at least see the value in reevaluating my lines when I see discrepancies between what I preach and what I do. Personally I'd rather live what I'm preaching and not preach what I'm not living.
So as you think about taking your kids to see the movie, think about all the times you've taken them to see movies that had atheistic writers, think about harry potter and how that had wizards and witches in it and about how you could argue that it "encouraged" witchcraft, and lord of the rings with all of the violence and the wizardry in that, then think about that little line that you've mentally drawn in the sand. Personally I'm going to go see that movie, heck I'll probably even go out and get the books and read em.
That being said you can understand how "The Church" has decided to boycott the movie. I found this....disquieting. One of the things that I have yet to fully come to terms with is peoples inability to draw lines and stick to them. Its a movie, and the makers of the movie have gone to lengths to take out any sort of religious propaganda. So what are you afraid of, are you scared your kids might read a book? Then make sure they don't read the books its that simple. Besides I've read plenty of books that espoused views that where not held by me, it didn't really change the way I saw things. I just thought "that was a good story". Besides, they're kids. There going to go, watch the movie and enjoy it for what it is, entertainment. On top of that most people go watch the movie simply because they don't want to read the book.
In the end though there is something more deep seeded I feel to this argument. I think most of those parents boycotting the movie would readily agree that they wouldn't take their kids to see any R rated films. Most I think would even say they don't like R rated films because of violence. I also think that you would find that many of those self same parents took their kids to see The Passion, which is a movie about watching Jesus get a beat down then tortured to death. This begs the obvious question, which I hope is the overarching question of this entire post. "Where do you draw the line?" and more importantly "Will you stick by that line?"
I think anyone would readily agree that an easy measure of a man is whether or not he sticks by his word. You won't take your kid to a movie because the author is an atheist? Well you might as well stay home from now on and never watch another movie unless its produced by In Light Broadcasting. Most writers of books and movies are atheists, "*gasp* say it ain't so!" I think you should draw the line and say thus farther and no more and stick by it. If you find that you start making exceptions to the rule then its time to reevaluate the line you drew. Is the line not in the right place, or is it simply your just not strong enough to stand by what you said?
I can think of a story which typifies this. Me and some of my friends where at an Applebees once. My friend was recounting a rather odd story. During the story he made mention of a necklace someone was wearing made out of fake penises. Now he had no trouble saying the word penis. But once it came to the point in the story where he was describing the fact that a certain female person had her genitals pierced he refused to say the word clitoris, or vagina for that matter. It bothered me to no end. Now I'm not one to go around yelling penis and vagina, but lets face it if I'm trying to describe something and it involves me talking about genitalia I'm not shy about naming either organ. The thing that bothered me was that he either draws the line at not saying either word or has no problem saying either word. Same thing with cussing. If you don't like it thats fine whatever, just don't go around saying that "shit" is ok to say but "fuck" is taking it too far. Once me and some friends where playing Guitar Hero and my friend, who's house we were in, said "shit" (for sake of understanding we will say his name was Jeff) . A few minutes later my other friend, lets say his name was Brian, said "fuck". Then Jeff proceeded to get mad at Brian for having said "fuck" in his house. After I recovered from my brain aneurysm, I thought how can you cuss in your house and then get made cause someone else cussed in your house? He said it was because what Brian had said was worse than what he had said. Personally I think if he had said either word in the presence of his mother it would not have gone over well either way.
Someone once said "be cold or be hot but don't be lukewarm", words to live by if you ask me. I'm not saying I'm perfect where this is concerned but I'm trying. I can at least see the value in reevaluating my lines when I see discrepancies between what I preach and what I do. Personally I'd rather live what I'm preaching and not preach what I'm not living.
So as you think about taking your kids to see the movie, think about all the times you've taken them to see movies that had atheistic writers, think about harry potter and how that had wizards and witches in it and about how you could argue that it "encouraged" witchcraft, and lord of the rings with all of the violence and the wizardry in that, then think about that little line that you've mentally drawn in the sand. Personally I'm going to go see that movie, heck I'll probably even go out and get the books and read em.
Monday, November 19, 2007
A Look At Philosophy....
I've lately been drawn again and again to the subject of philosophy. For someone who's whole world more or less revolves around questions, I'm surprised I've never really ever taken a closer look at philosophy until now. As I thought about philosophy the Great Divine made an interesting point. That Philosophy is the science of asking questions which can only be answered by divinity. Philosophy is really a process, a process of asking questions that reveal new questions. The answer is never the ultimate goal, the answer is more a key to new questions and if you take the process far enough you always run into questions that can only be answered by divinity (my mother is great at this: "have you seen your brother?", "did you talk to him?", "what did he say?", "a new job?", "do they give him benefits?", "what kind?" and so on. Until I feel ready to throttle her, of course she usually hits upon the really important questions near the end and you get used to the interrogations after awhile and I can see the validity in them). Its often enough the middle ground between science and spiritualism, dabbling in both and reconciling the two often enough.
I like to think of it as a process of refining. You refine your questions until you reach the questions that really matter, those that deal with things way beyond our ability to grasp or understand. It also helps you get a grip, gives you perspective by making you remember that you are just one person in billions. Wikipedia describes it thusly: "Though no single definition of philosophy is uncontroversial, and the field has historically expanded and changed depending upon what kinds of questions were interesting or relevant in a given era, it is generally agreed that philosophy is a method, rather than a set of claims, propositions, or theories. Its investigations are based upon rational thinking, striving to make no unexamined assumptions and no leaps based on faith or pure analogy."
Its all part of something I like to call mind vs magic. The idea that there are 2 extremes, the extreme of the mind being someone that thinks logically and once they run up on something that can't be explained through science or logic doesn't turn to spirituality or divinity to explain it but comes up with some excuse or simply accepts it as a phenomenon and nothing else and then they put their faith in science to one day explain it away. The extreme of magic is no less dangerous, spirituality, religion, superstition. This person holds on to belief systems without first examining each question carefully against his beliefs, so like the person who operates purely from the mind state they often hold beliefs incongruous with one another, they throw away the ideas of logic and reasoning thinking them dangerous weapons that undermine faith.
I have a mantra that I like to use "balance in all things". I think its a good mantra to have and does a good job of explaining who I am and the way I am. Often I find that I will take an opposite stance to something that is being discussed, ala the devils advocate. Its just part of the way I am, I think that both sides of an argument should be present in order for people to have an open and honest discussion of something. Interestingly enough even when something that I agree with comes up I will take the subject and slant it, come at it from another angle almost undermine the argument just to be sure that some other side to the argument is present. Shadraq can attest to this as we had a discussion about the wording for one of his polls he did on his blog.
This also explains the way I see this argument. I think that the "mind" and "magic" should be used together, that you should have beliefs and a system of beliefs in things greater than yourself but you should also use the mind to think logically about any questions which arise, weighing them against your belief system. There are some things that can't be explained by the mind and those often must be taken on blind faith, but there are also things which can be examined through use of logic and reasoning and you should examine things in that way (the previous discussion of pentagrams being a prime example of this). This way your not left with an incongruous belief system, going around killing people because they are suspected of witchcraft...
I like to think of it as a process of refining. You refine your questions until you reach the questions that really matter, those that deal with things way beyond our ability to grasp or understand. It also helps you get a grip, gives you perspective by making you remember that you are just one person in billions. Wikipedia describes it thusly: "Though no single definition of philosophy is uncontroversial, and the field has historically expanded and changed depending upon what kinds of questions were interesting or relevant in a given era, it is generally agreed that philosophy is a method, rather than a set of claims, propositions, or theories. Its investigations are based upon rational thinking, striving to make no unexamined assumptions and no leaps based on faith or pure analogy."
Its all part of something I like to call mind vs magic. The idea that there are 2 extremes, the extreme of the mind being someone that thinks logically and once they run up on something that can't be explained through science or logic doesn't turn to spirituality or divinity to explain it but comes up with some excuse or simply accepts it as a phenomenon and nothing else and then they put their faith in science to one day explain it away. The extreme of magic is no less dangerous, spirituality, religion, superstition. This person holds on to belief systems without first examining each question carefully against his beliefs, so like the person who operates purely from the mind state they often hold beliefs incongruous with one another, they throw away the ideas of logic and reasoning thinking them dangerous weapons that undermine faith.
I have a mantra that I like to use "balance in all things". I think its a good mantra to have and does a good job of explaining who I am and the way I am. Often I find that I will take an opposite stance to something that is being discussed, ala the devils advocate. Its just part of the way I am, I think that both sides of an argument should be present in order for people to have an open and honest discussion of something. Interestingly enough even when something that I agree with comes up I will take the subject and slant it, come at it from another angle almost undermine the argument just to be sure that some other side to the argument is present. Shadraq can attest to this as we had a discussion about the wording for one of his polls he did on his blog.
This also explains the way I see this argument. I think that the "mind" and "magic" should be used together, that you should have beliefs and a system of beliefs in things greater than yourself but you should also use the mind to think logically about any questions which arise, weighing them against your belief system. There are some things that can't be explained by the mind and those often must be taken on blind faith, but there are also things which can be examined through use of logic and reasoning and you should examine things in that way (the previous discussion of pentagrams being a prime example of this). This way your not left with an incongruous belief system, going around killing people because they are suspected of witchcraft...
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