Things as they stand...

...or fall for that matter.

Its been an interesting past few weeks. School started, I now have what I consider the greatest job I could have ever asked for, things in my life have started to become hectic and unordered. I'm working at a Department of Energy lab now doing sort of grunt work for the researchers there. But I love my job and the people I work for. I'm not sure why it is that I find loading the dishwasher for them or making media for them or defrosting freezers for them so enjoyable. Maybe its because they thank me for things that I just assume are part of my job description. I think that's part of it. There is genuine sense of gratitude you get when someone says they love you after you have defrosted a freezer for them, and they have that look on their face like you have no idea how much your actions have helped them. To top it off I'm going fulltime at school. Taking classes at both my community college and the real college way on the other side of town, which means my days are rather jam packed.

I feel like walking out my door driving to the airport and catching a flight to anywhere but here, preferably Europe or the Sahara. Two very desperate places I know, and what an odd thing to say at that. I just really have this strong urge to get out of Dodge. I won't be going anywhere till I've finished up my BA, but it seems feelings don't wait. I also feel like I'm in a very tenuous time right now emotionally spiritually and physically. I got sick this week and have had this same cold for almost two weeks now, and it seems as if emotionally I'm back on ye olde roller coaster yet again. I don't even have an idea where I am spiritually. I think that's a sign I need to step back and get my bearings, its also probably a cause of my current emotional state. However between work and school I'm having a hard time making time for things of a spiritual nature, which I am constantly reminded is more a function of my unwillingness to make that time and less a function of time itself.